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Thursday, September 8, 2011

Disappointment

Constantly, I am disappointed by people. I was just going to state specific groups, but then I realized that is everything that I talk to. So I will just be general and say "people". Any type of party I throw, barely anyone comes. It makes me feel like I have no friends, or at least the people I thought were friends, really do not care about me.

I was going to have a jewelry party for a friend so she could build up some clientele, not because I really wanted the jewelry. I was even going to buy a few things, even though I don't really need anything. I invited A LOT of people. I got two "maybes" and 3 "yeses". 3?! Seriously...that is it? Thanks everyone. Way to make me feel lame. I even told people not to feel obligated to buy anything. I just wanted to get together with some girls. I was just being reminded of my baby shower all over again.

I was having a base friends baby shower. I made sure to schedule it during a time where people would not be on leave and I gave out the invitations way in advance, and only 4 people showed up. 3 of those people helped out with the baby shower. The main hostess actually went across the street and invited strangers over to my baby shower. It was so embarrassing.

I wanted to avoid another one of those moments, so I just cancelled the party. I feel bad for the girl who was going to try and sell her stuff, but I just don't want to feel even more like crap by having a pathetic party. I already feel terrible, but I know it would just have been worse on Saturday.

It is so difficult just to find good friends in general, but even more difficult in the military life. A lot of these women are flaky and only care about themselves. I keep trying to make some good friends, but I only make a couple that are pretty busy in their own lives. I guess I am pretty busy in my own life as well, but I still have not found someone that I "click" with and I have been here for almost 3 years now. I thought I found someone, but they just stopped talking to me.

I am starting to wonder if there is something wrong with me and my husband. We cannot seem to keep friends. We are going to be moving within a year anyway, so I can just start all over again trying to find friends and being disappointed at another base. Gotta love this life.

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